Everybody wants kids to be loving and kind towards them, especially the parents. Also, the teachers, who expect the children to be kind towards their fellow mates, except when it is a matter of tests and assignments. At least the children can share an extra pen or paper or lunch boxes or their understanding of the lessons with the other kids of their class.

Parents especially want to raise the kind of children who are loving, kind, patient, understanding, appreciative, and helpful. But most often they receive rebelliousness, unwillingness, and laziness from their kids. This article will help you understand how you can raise more loving and kind children.

But first of all, we need to understand from where this lovingness emerges in a person. Love, we need to understand, is not a thing that can be bestowed upon somebody. It reflects from a person. It is a part of their attitude and overall nature. Just like a fragrant flower in a garden which is not giving its fragrance to you while you are passing by it, but is fragrant even despite your or anybody else’s presence. Love is like that fragrance. It is there in a loving person all the time.

We need to make the kids loving like that fragrant flower. For that, you need to give up on this expectation to be more special to your kids. You cannot expect your child to be loving towards you and not towards anybody else. You can’t expect the child to behave rudely to a stranger on the street or to their maid or servant at home, and be loving towards you. Your child has to equally love all the other existences in the world. Your child has to love even when there is no person to give love to.

Once you understand this, once you give up on this expectation to be extra special to your children, you’ll find how much your child loves you. You cannot expect a flower to be more fragrant to you than to any other being. Likewise, make your child loving towards everybody else they come across. Don’t let them talk rudely to any other person. If you’ll want your child to talk badly to another person, your child will think you are a hypocrite when you’ll ask them to love you and speak gently with you. This is because children do not understand the contradictions. Either something is there or it is not there. Either they should be kind to people, or they shouldn’t be kind to people. There is no exception.

Ask your child to appreciate everything and every person they find good. Ask them to be grateful towards whoever helps them out in any way. Tell them they should never miss an opportunity to be kind to other people. Your child does not discriminate people based on their colour, language, caste, religion, or creed. It is something that you teach to your kids. This discrimination comes from you. And then one day they end up learning that people need to earn their love and kindness. For the same reason, they might not find you worthy of their kindness in future.

Hence, it is important to raise your kids to become a good human being first, before they even start choosing their idols. Their upbringing matters the most in shaping their personality. And once they grow up into an adult, their nature, their kindness to other human beings, their gentleness, and their regard will be the first thing anybody will notice in them.